Baby Shower Planning Timeline

Two dates matter. The first is the date of the shower itself. The second is the point at which planning begins, counted backwards from it. The countdown below applies in either case.

Choosing the date

For a shower held before the birth, six to eight weeks before the due date works well. That leaves room for a baby who arrives ahead of schedule, and avoids the last weeks of pregnancy. Where the pregnancy is difficult, or where early labour is a possibility, eight to ten weeks ahead is safer.

For a shower held after the birth, four to six weeks after the arrival is the usual interval. It gives the family time to settle into some kind of routine before a room full of visitors appears. Showers held afterwards suit a number of situations: a second or third child, an adoption, or simply a preference for not celebrating in advance. The arguments either way are set out in Deciding when to have the baby shower, before or after.

Six to eight weeks before the shower

• Settle the date, the time, the location and whether there will be a theme, with the guest of honour or without, depending on whether the shower is a surprise
• Begin the guest list
• Reserve the venue and confirm what the booking includes
• Order or buy the invitations
• Draft the food and drink list
• Where a gift list is being used, the expectant parents set it up and pass the details to the host

Four to six weeks before

• Finalise the guest list, address the invitations and post them
• Plan the games and any prizes
• Buy the favours, allowing extra time for anything personalised
• Buy decorations and matching paper goods — bunting, centrepieces, signage
• Confirm the menu

Three weeks before

• Reconfirm the venue booking
• For a shower at home, gather enough tables, chairs, serving dishes and glassware for the numbers expected, borrowing what is missing

One week before

• Draw up the running order for the day: food, games, opening gifts, anything else
• Chase anyone who has not replied, and fix the final headcount
• For a shower at home, start cleaning
• Order the cake
• Order flowers, if any
• Buy the food that keeps
• Prepare and freeze anything that can be made ahead
• Arrange transport for the guest of honour in both directions, remembering she will leave with a good deal more than she arrived with

Two days before

• Move furniture to make room for guests
• Put up the decorations
• Reconfirm the cake order
• Reconfirm the venue details
• Set up and decorate a table for gifts
• Start the food preparation

The day before

• Finish the food
• Finish the cleaning
• Choose a comfortable chair for the guest of honour and place it where everyone can see her
• Check cameras and phones are charged
• Order balloons to mark the entrance
• Put out bins and bags for wrapping paper

On the day

• For a shower away from home, arrive early to decorate and check the food, drink and cake
• Collect the cake, flowers and balloons
• Lay out food and drink on the tables set aside for them
• Greet guests as they arrive
• Keep to the running order
• Leave enough slack in it to enjoy the afternoon

Adjusting the countdown

A shower arranged at shorter notice compresses without much difficulty. The six-to-eight-week and four-to-six-week stages can be run together into a single fortnight of decisions, provided invitations still go out three or four weeks ahead and any personalised favours are ordered immediately.

A shower held after the birth generally wants a shorter, quieter format than one held before: fewer guests, a shorter afternoon, and the parents' home rather than a hired room. The list above still applies, but the scale of it drops.

One decision belongs only to the after-birth shower. Guests who have already sent something when the baby arrived may not expect to bring a second gift, so it is worth settling early whether gifts are part of the occasion at all, and saying so on the invitation.

Themes

A theme is optional, but it makes decisions about decorations, cake and favours resolve themselves. Nine that work in either format:

• Welcome to the world — maps, globes and postcards, with guests writing wishes on cards shaped like boarding passes
• Storybook — classic children's books, with quotations and illustrations as decoration and guests asked to bring a favourite title
• Little star — stars, moons and planets in deep blue and gold, with star-shaped biscuits
• Teddy bears' picnic — blankets, hampers and bears as centrepieces, best outdoors
• Rainbow — a full colour spectrum across balloons, table settings and icing
• Woodland — deer, foxes and owls, with wood and greenery for warmth
• Tea party — china, teapots and flowers, with sandwiches, scones and a choice of teas
• The first year — month-by-month photo props, with guests predicting milestones or offering advice
• Garden party — greenery and blossom, botanical food, and an outdoor setting